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“NO DEFINITION”

I decided to stop by Tolu’s place after work, This decision had taken 6weeks to make. Let me quickly put you in the know. Tolu and I had been friends since Uni I met him as a fresher while he was already in his third year. On that faithful day, I noticed the bus driver didn’t collect the usual bus fair of 50 naira from me. When I inquired he told me that one of the guys at the back had paid for me. I turned to thank the good samaritan but instead I saw 4 guys grinning sheepishly. I hissed and turned away. . . . . I got off the bus amidst calls of “hey hey” “excuse me”. I quicken my pace and disappeared amongst a huge gathering. I Finally got to my class and breathed a sigh of relief as I wasn’t being followed. I thought to myselF how stupid those guys where if one of them thought he was going to “GET ME” with just 50 naira.“NO DEFINITION” I busied myself with lectures and soon forget the incident of that morning. Towards evening it occurred to me that my phone hadn’t even rang all day. I reached for my bag to get it and it wasn’t there…. I instantly died a little inside, i search everywhere for it but cant find it. I even borrow a neigbours phone to call it. It rings but no one picks. . I resigned to fate that it must have been stolen and wearily pack my things and head for the bus stop. I am almost getting on a bus when someone tapped me. When I turn, i recognize him to be one of thE giggling morons from the morninG. “WHAT AN OPPORTUNITY” to let out steam. I quickly trAnsferr all my aggression on him. I go as far as stuffing a 200 naira note into his pocket and asking him to keep the change. All this while he just stands there with a weird grin plastered on his face. When I am done he slips his hand into his pocket, hands me my phone and leaves. I had never been more embarrassed in my entire life. Like you already guessed, it turned out that when I got down from the bus my phone fell off and the dude whom I found out his name to be Tolu picked it up and was calling me to come get it, he missed all his classes that day waiting to see if I would pass again to come look for it. To cut the long story short we became best friends. We were inseparable the only time we weren’t together were during classes. I was a law student while he was an “engine boy” as engineering boys were called . The whole school thought We were dating where as we hadn’t even as much as kissed. We continued this way until he left school a year later for his nysc. I still had 3yrs to go but tolu somehow found a way to come and see me as often as possible. I “liked” Tolu a lot. He was my body guard, school father,big brother,best friend,confidant etc etc. The list was endless. My friends were green with envy. They always told me “your so lucky” and “he hasn’t even touched you”. I was always appalled by their questions. I mean why would Tolu touch me (rolling my eyes) we were not that kinda friends. In my final year I became the course rep and this was greatly used to my advantage. I only had 5 courses per semester. I liased with my lectures and pushed my classes for Mondays and tuesdays. This gave me the rest of the week to travel and go flex with him as he now had a demanding job and couldn’t visit like he always did. It was on one of such trips that “he touched me” and even though it was my first time, he made the movies I had seen and the novels I had read seem like child’s play. I quickly added “boyfriend” to that list I made earlier and things continued to be rosy between us. We were now officially a couple I mean we were having sex weren’t we?.




We made sure I was posted to Abj for my law school so we could be close. Then the shocker came, his company was sending him to china for 3yrs. I was heartbroken and cried uncontrollably the day he was leaving. Tolu called me a crybaby and hugged me,he promised not to make me miss him and that he would keep in touch everyday. True to his words I didn’t really miss him cos I still felt his presence. We talked everyday for the 3yrs.


One day Tolu told me he was coming back to nigeria and we needed to talk… I was ecstatic I instantly knew he was going to propose to me. I couldn’t hide my joy. I went shopping and prepared for his coming. He came in on a tuesday night and calleD me. I was away on official assignment but was due back the next day, we made dinner plans. When I came back I quickly made my hair, and of course nails. I didn’t want my fingers to look horrible when he would put the ring on it. I took my time to dress that day. I didn’t wear mascara cos I didn’t want my eye make up to run in case I cried. I was certain I would cry when he gave me the ring. I arrived the venue 20minutes later than our scheduled time, but I didn’t mind, My Tolu was waiting patiently for me.. He looked casual in a T-shirt and jean. He complimented my dressing and asked me if I had other plans after the dinner as I was so gorgeously dressed. I giggled nervously, Tolu always had a great sense of humor. He kept touching my face and complimented my hair. He said I had become even more beautiful and that any man will be lucky to have me, I held my breath. He came close to me I naturally assumed he was going to kiss me instead he pecked my forehead. I didn’t mind I just assumed he didn’t wanna smudge my lipstick. Dear friends I went to the rest rooms three times to ensure my looks where perfect. I wanted to look pretty in pictures as I was sure people around me would take pictures when he got on his knees.. Tolu finally took my hand when I came back and I could tell he was looking at my fingers. He removed the cocktail ring I was wearing and asked what size it was I told him. He said I ought to be wearing real diamonds instead of Crystal glasses. He put his hands in his pocket and I start smiling sheepishly. Instead he brings out his handkerchief. I am still holding my breath. He now tells me how a certain friend of his wanted to propose to someone but didn’t know how and asked how best to do it… By now I was smiling sheepishly. I just told him to tell him to go ahead and do it that I was sure no girl would refuse him. He asked if I was sure I said yes.. By this time I was close to tears and my eyes were closed. I expected to find Tolu on his knees when I opened it. After an uncomfortable silence. I opened them and he was still sitting starring at me with a grin on his face. He asked if I was sleeping. I said NO. He said anyways let’s go. He dropped me off and rejected the offer to stay over. As he had a long day tomorrow. I went to bed confused. I just assumed he didn’t buy the ring and he also wanted to be sure I would agree.


The next day I was preparing a Brief for a client when Tolu called he was screaming happily I couldn’t hear him as there was loud music at the background.. I disconnected the call and sent him an sms asking him to “send me an sms”. His sms comes and reads. “She said yes”. I am confused and I reply “yes to what?” He replies ” I proposed and she said yes”. I wake up in the hospital the next day. I slip past the nurses and take a cab home. Tolu calls me all month long but I won’t speak to him. He comes by my office and my house but the security won’t let him in. He is surprised as to why I Don’t wanna see him. He sends so many text messages. “The last of which reads “please talk to me you are my best friend”.


That night I sit in my empty house and think. All these years I took Tolu to be bodyguard, my father,my confidant and my everything while I was just “his best friend”. When I added boyfriend to the list he added “with benefits” to his own. When I got to his place I cried uncontrollably of course he had led me on.


Tolu was quick to remind me that he didn’t lead me on he didn’t remember expressly telling me he wanted us to date. I was quick to remind him that he was the one who popped my cherry and he was the only guy I have ever been with. He responded by telling me that if he had known he wouldn’t have done it… Tolu said that there was “NO DEFINITION” to our friendship (he didn’t say relationship) and he thought I understood the position of things.


His wedding is next month. I took my annual leave 3 months earlier than normal. I haven’t left my house in 3weeks. MORAL OF THE STORY…. You tell me



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